A rundown of all the April Fools foolishness from our favourite automakers and media outlets
Road & Track – Kobayashi’s Caterham censored in Japanese F1 broadcasts
“At this point, we feel that it’s simply inappropriate to show his Caterham car on television,” a spokesperson explained. “There are children watching. The elderly may be watching. It’s a difficult situation.”
MINI – MINI shoots and scores: The MINI Paceman GoalCooper
Munich. The countdown is on in Brazil and soccer fans are gearing up for the biggest global sporting event of the year. Jerseys and flags are in huge demand but one question remains: what will be the car of choice for celebrating fans from mid June? MINI is sure to strike from outside the box with its homage to the beautiful game: the MINI Paceman GoalCooper.
This top international player is based on the MINI John Cooper Works Paceman, and is equipped with all it takes to make it from the group stages through to the final. The MINI Design Team captained by Oliviero Weilinho combined the colours green, blue and yellow to come up with the exclusive Danielson multi-coloured exterior line, giving MINI an early 1:0 lead.
The interior kit is far from off-side, astro turf floor mats in Brasileiro Green and the “floodlights” in the shape of a MINI LED interior lighting package give a stadium like feel. With this equipment aboard the MINI Paceman GoalCooper will set off “Mexican waves” on all four seats. It is match-fit when it comes to reliving controversial referee decisions and glorious goals via live web stream. A universal holder for smartphones and a rear holder for the Apple iPad will ensure comfortable viewing on the rear seat terraces. For relieving pre-match tension or enjoying some half-time downtime the MINI Paceman GoalCooper features a miniature table football set mounted on the Center Rail.
The MINI Paceman GoalCooper is fully equipped for training between matches. The rear seatbacks can be folded over to turn the boot, which is fully clad in AstroTurf, into a football goal. The net is attached behind the front seats. The MINI Paceman GoalCooper has a top defence line-up making it very difficult for any striker to score. As soon as the Park Distance Control (PDC) sensors, in conjunction with the interior monitoring sensors of the alarm system, register a shot on goal, the electric tailgate is operated, instantly closing the tailgate, reflecting the ball and keeping the box clean.
If a player successfully puts one past the ‘keeper’, he can share his success immediately with other MINI drivers. When the final whistle has been blown after 90 minutes the score is transmitted to the iPad in the MINI via a special MINI Paceman GoalCooper MINI Connected App. Thanks to intelligent connectivity the results can be compared online with other registered users at any time. The table is updated every day and at the end of the tournament the MINI Community World Champion will lift the trophy.
The new star of the MINI Team will be officially presented on 1 April 2014. All details regarding transfer fees and contract periods will remain strictly confidential until then.
BMW UK – BMW Force Injection Booster – Driving slow never felt so fast
BMW looks set to change the face of motoring with the introduction of a patented artificial G-force technology.
BMW’s new Force Injection Booster simulates the effects of spirited driving, even when commuting at slower speeds, to create a thrilling ride. When activated at speeds under 20mph, the Force Injection Booster (FIB) works by extracting kinetic energy from the car’s engine and converting it into positive g-forces. These are then channelled directly at the driver and passengers through the air conditioning vents, while a mild electric current is delivered through the front seats, to simulate the same exhilarating feeling of driving at high speed*.
This technology comes complete with the BMW AirNet®, the latest in hair protection technology, to ensure that occupant’s don’t have to compromise between personal style and driving performance.
Professor Mika Notbetrü, Head of BMW Innovation, describes FIB technology as “Mind-blowingly unbelievable”.
The Force Injection Booster will be available across the BMW range from 1 April, 2014. For more information on this optional feature please call 0800 093 6161 or email mika.notbetru@bmw.com.
*Face alteration is not permanent
MINI UK – Fancy a Cooper T?
Enhancing the company’s sustainability credentials, MINI’s scientists, engineers and product designers have unveiled the new MINI Cooper T – the world’s first vehicle to be powered by a tea-leaf biofuel composite.
This revolutionary new model, which is available in a variety of colours including ‘Chamomile Yellow’, ‘Red Bush’ and ‘Earl Grey’, is expected to cause a real stir in the motor industry when it’s served up later this month.
Capable of covering up to 40 miles on a single cup, Cooper T certainly isn’t what you’d call thirsty. It boasts all the standard features you would expect, such as VVT, ABS and DSC, but also benefits from DAT or Dunk Avoidance Technology. This ingenious filtration system stops peckish owners and opportunistic passersby from inserting biscuits into the MINI T’s fuel tank in order to moisten their snacks.
Head of Cooper T engineering, Dr. Ivana Kuppa, said, “This particular project has been brewing for years. Our extensive research has shown that the nation’s favourite drink is also an ideal biofuel. We already know good things come in small packages, but with Cooper T customers benefitting from up to 40 miles per cup, we are delighted to have the opportunity to bring this car to market.”
MINI customers in the Gloucestershire area can get a first taste of the Cooper T at MINI Cotswold Gloucester on 1 April, where the vehicle will be displayed.
For further information about the MINI Cooper T, visit MINI UK’s Facebook page at facebook.com/MINIUK.
Opel – New Special Edition Opel Astra Copacabana
Rüsselsheim. The new Opel Astra Copacabana conjures up Brazil’s sun and passion on European roads. The special model is a ‘must have’ for all genuine soccer fans – from Rotterdam to Istanbul, from Liverpool to Dortmund. With the sporty Astra, Opel continues its engagement in international professional soccer. The Copacabana is as spellbinding as a Brazilian ball wizard and will be a real attention-getter at every public screening this summer.
The Brazilian flag on the roof, palm trees and dancing lines along the doors – it’s exterior already shows pure South American temperament. And indeed, under the hood the new 200 hp/147 kW 1.6 Turbo gasoline engine is just waiting to be let loose. Acceleration from zero to 100 km/h in 7.9 seconds will press the driver back into the seat made of real grass upholstery. A masterpiece of craftsmanship, Opel’s interior designers successfully processed original grass from the famous Maracanã Stadium. Every car comes with a certificate confirming the authenticity of the sacred greenery. Just as authentic are the footwells filled with finest Copacabana sand – this beach flair gave the Astra its name. And every special edition comes with a cool pair of flip-flops.
Sounding in Samba or Vuvuzela tones, the horn provides true stadium atmosphere, as does a beverage vending machine that mixes up ice cold Caipirinhas during the drive – alcohol-free, of course. Because the Cachaça goes directly into the tank as a turbo cocktail. The Astra Copacabana is as Brazilian as Pelé and as German as Jürgen Klopp – a truly exotic blend: for just 24,444.44 euros from April 1 at your Opel dealer!
Honda USA – New “Fit Kit” Enables DIYers to Assemble Honda Fit in Their Own Home
Kit cars have been around for decades for replica vehicles, but the industry will receive a big jolt with the 2015 Fit Kit, (#FitKit) the first production car you build yourself, in the convenience of your own home. Honda will offer the Fit Kit, all 200,000 mechanical parts, starting on April 14, with the launch of the all-new, fully assembled 2015 Fit available only at Honda dealers across the United States.
“We read comments every day on enthusiast forums suggesting they could build a better car themselves, so we decided to take it a step further and let people actually build one,” said Kuruma Tsukuru, global manager of the new at-home assembly project for American Honda Motor Co., Inc. “Young people around the world are making their own handmade belts, coasters and tie racks, why not their own Fit? The next generation is ripe for this personalized and cost-saving option.”
After using the “build and price” feature to configure their Fit online at http://www.automobiles.honda.com/fit, customers will literally have the choice of building it themselves or taking delivery of a Honda-assembled vehicle at a Honda dealership. With the build-at-home option, now in beta, customers will receive a detailed instruction manual and DVD along with a complete set of parts to assemble a 2015 Fit.
“Building your own Fit is not for everyone. It requires basic mechanical skills, a creative spirit and a strong desire to connect with the product you create,” added Tsukuru. “Our first customer testers show that we have customers who seek a deeper relationship with the goods they use, and we’ll now offer that.”
The 2015 Fit goes on sale April 14 and is completely redesigned to deliver an unparalleled combination of style, interior space, fun-to-drive performance and fuel efficiency, plus leading-edge vehicle connectivity and numerous standard features. Now, with the ability to build it yourself, the Fit offers a best-in-class personal connection that is unmatched by other automakers.
Peugeot UK – Audio Sonic Personalisation Programme for car horns
You can easily personalise and change your mobile phone ring. Why not your car horn? Soon Peugeot drivers will be able to do just that. The new Audio Sonic Personalisation Programme will allow you to change your car horn to reflect your own unique personal style and taste, either by choosing from an extensive sound library, or by creating and uploading your own sound.
The new Audio Sonic Personalisation Programme will allow you to change your car horn to reflect your own unique personal style and taste, either by choosing from an extensive sound library, or by creating and uploading your own sound.
So whether you’re a fan of classical music or a seasoned clubber, whether you love the sounds of the natural environment like rain or thunder, or just want to record your favourite catchphrase, you’ll be able to find or create a car horn that says something about who you are.
This is a hugely exciting development, made possible through the dedication of our team of product designers and sound engineers. And it’s destined to change the way we alert our fellow road users forever.
Toyota Canada – 2014 Corolla NLE (Neon Light Emitting) Edition
Our newest NLE (Neon Light Emitting) colour options are guaranteed to turn some heads! Available in green, pink and yellow. Find out more here: http://on.fb.me/Oa5Lcg
Toyota USA – Toyota reintroduces the Tercel
You asked, and we listened. Reintroducing one of the most iconic Toyota cars of the last 30 years. That’s right, we #broughtitback!
Citroën UK – Citroën C4 Cactus Arsenal Edition
Making its debut ahead of the 2014/15 season, Citroën will produce a special Arsenal edition of the forthcoming C4 Cactus.
Limited to just 11 models and kitted out in the red, blue and gold shades of the Gunners’ iconic crest, the C4 Cactus Arsenal showcases new technology to help the Club’s most dedicated supporters follow their beloved team in comfort and style.
The integrated dashboard console will feature Citroën’s new Geo Organised Away-day Location, Information & Entertainment interface, or G.O.A.L.I.E. The touchscreen system is preloaded with all of Arsenal’s away fixtures, including directions to the matches, a database of pie and mash vendors and a music playlist of rousing football anthems to sing along to.
Head of Citroën UK’s Special Projects division, Joseph King commented; ‘We think Mr Wenger and the team will be delighted with this new special edition. As Official Automotive Partner to Arsenal, Citroën is always looking for new ways of celebrating our relationship. With the new fan-focused in-car technology, we think this model is pitch-perfect for the dedicated Arsenal supporter.’
Avina Jolie from Citroën France added, ‘On espère que tout le monde a reconnu que c’est une petite blague de notre part. Sinon, et si vous parlez français ou si vous utilisez un service de traduction, il faut dire que cette histoire n’est pas vrai. On ne produira pas cette voiture.’
The C4 Cactus Arsenal will be available to order from all Citroën showrooms later this year.*
*Except Citroën Tottenham.
Prior Design – BMW M6 PD6XX Widebody Pickup Truck Conversion
Acura USA – Acura Celebrates 28 years as America’s Top Luxury Automotive Brand, Alphabetically
Acura today celebrated an important milestone, marking 28 consecutive years as the top luxury automobile brand in America based on alphabetical ranking1. Since its inception as the first luxury brand from a Japanese automaker, in March 1986, Acura has maintained a clear alphabetical leadership position over all other luxury brands, including Audi, BMW, Mercedes and Lexus.
“At Acura, there are many things we’re proud of, and one of those things is our alphabetic dominance. I mean, these are the A-B-Cs of marketing, and no one does it better than Acura,” said Mike Accavitti, Senior Vice President and General Manager of Acura. “Audi has been nipping at our heels since the beginning, and then there was that deal with Amati, which never really had a shot. We even toyed with adding another A on the front of the name, but we’re confident that we can maintain our leadership, assuming no one comes along with Abalone or Aardvark or something like that.”
Next month, Acura will debut its newest model, the Acura TLX sports sedan, at the 2014 New York International Auto Show (no kidding). The Acura press conference is scheduled for 1:50 p.m. (EST) on April 16, 2014 inside the Jacob Javits Convention Center. The conference can also be viewed live on www.youtube.com/acura. For members of the media, press materials and photography will be posted at www.acuranews.com immediately following the press conference.
“We probably should have called it the A-TLX, “added Accavitti. “But it’s still a damn fine vehicle, even if it’s not first in the yellow pages.”
Expressing his enthusiasm for the future of the Acura brand, Accavitti, who leads the alphabetical rankings of luxury automobile marketing executives, concluded by saying, “Happy April Fool’s Day everyone!”
1 Based on the ordering of luxury automotive brand names in ascending fashion using the standard Latin Alphabet.
Škoda UK – Fur Yeti Fans Everywhere – the Yeti Ice Special Edition
ŠKODA is celebrating the launch of its new Yeti range with a remarkable new special edition – the Yeti Ice. On sale today, the new model pioneers a radical new faux fur finish that has been developed by ŠKODA engineers working in the Himalayas.
The Yeti Ice’s faux fur has numerous advantages over traditional paint, as its inventor, Dr Yu Ciddingme explains: “The fur is so thick and luxurious that during our tests in the arctic circle, our test drivers didn’t need to use the heater.”
The new model is based on the new Yeti and Yeti Outdoor launched in January and was developed under the code number 010414. All models will be built to order with owners able to choose from a number of personalisation options, including side-partings and fur extensions.
Owners will find that maintaining the Yeti Ice’s fur is easy thanks to standard specification that includes a lifetime supply of ŠKODA-branded shampoo and conditioner and a comb and brush kit to preserve the well-groomed look.
Head of Special Developments, Prof Lukat Thedate said: “Everybody loves the new furry finish. People like to give it a hug and a tickle under the bumper.”
For those who would find the Yeti Ice’s faux fur to be impractical, models with more traditional paintwork finishes are available in ŠKODA retailers across the country with prices starting from £16,600
CarScoops – All-New 2015 Mazda MX-5 Miata Official Sketch Leaked, Debuts at NY Auto Show!
An official sketch of the next generation 2015 (or 2016MY) Mazda MX-5 Miata has been leaked ahead of the roadster model’s unveil at the New York Auto Show later this month, confirming a recent report from Autoweek magazine that the Japanese firm would bring the car to the Big Apple for its world premiere.
We will be adding all the jokes as we find them throughout the next couple of days.
